How I Do Counseling

For me, counseling is a process that leads to the resolution of a problem. The problem, or issue, may be associated with a specific life event, or you may just not feel right about your life situation. The issue could be an emotional response that is not working (e.g. angry, depressed, anxious), a life situation that has not gone well (e.g. job loss, relationship difficulty, problem with the boss) or a growth opportunity that has not been realized (e.g. What do I want to be when I grow up?). Depending on the issue and the stage of counseling we are in, the “mode” of counseling I use will range from therapist, to counselor, to coach.

When in the therapist mode, my theoretical orientation is psychodynamic with a strong cognitive component. The primary reference I use, Key Competencies in Brief Dynamic Psychotherapy (Binder, 2004), is both effective and contemporary. Research has shown that the majority of clients decide on brief therapy by default, that is, they simply terminate sessions when they are ready. By intentionally deciding in the beginning that therapy has a goal and that your time for therapy is limited, we can become more focused on the problem you choose to resolve. We will work together as a therapeutic team to clarify the pattern of response to life that is not working and to develop better options.

My therapeutic approach also assumes that your problem is either about how you relate to others (inter-personal), how you feel about your self (intra-personal), or how you interpret the world around you. I also assume that the way you respond to a problem, your response pattern, is learned in the past, but maintained in the present. You learned to solve problems in a certain way for good reasons, unfortunately there are times when the old solution does not work in a new situation.

The counseling mode is more oriented to problem solving and decision making. For many clients a key decision concerns what behavior pattern(s) they choose to change. While working with me, you will decide for yourself what works for you that you want to hold on to, and what doesn’t work that you want to change. For clients who have more of an “existential” issue (Who am I?), decisions may concern what goals to pursue, what career path to follow, or what relationships to build.

When we get to the change phase of counseling the mode is best described as coaching. Within a counseling session, I “coach” my clients when they are building interpersonal skills. Because I use brief dynamic approaches, the actual changes and use of new skills will take place outside of therapy. I may also “coach” clients on a periodic basis when they begin to put new behavior patterns in place.